In a shocking new development that is sure to send ripples across Major League Baseball, George Steinbrenner, with what may prove to be his final official command from high atop the Yankees lofty tower, has announced today that he has bought the naming rights to Fenway Park. Fans are in shock as they now wait in fearful anticipation of what name George will choose.
John Henry did not return calls, but made a brief statement via email last night. "As you know, we are committed to providing the best possible baseball experience for our fans, and to do that we have to look at creative ways of generating revenue. On the surface, this may appear to be a win for the Yankees. But, think about it. What have they gained? Not much more than the potential for some verbal one-up-man-ship. But from our point of view, we have raised a tremendous amount of new revenue that we can now invest in scouting, player development, and free agency. But, that's not all, this deal is so lucrative for us, that we are in effect draining the Yankee's own funding. Plus with the Boston Globe being owned by the New York Times, we felt there was some inevitability to all of this anyway."
Terms of the deal have not been made public, but sources confirm the Red Sox will be receiving in excess of One Hundred Million Dollars per year. That will, in effect force the Yankees to begin thinking about payroll cutting. In fact, the Steinbrenners have been spotted secretly meeting with the Florida Marlins over the past week, presumably comparing payroll strategies.
All of Red Sox Nation awaits word on what the final name will be. Guesses have been thrown around, including:
Yankee Outhouse
Steinbrenner's Bathroom
Loserville Stadium
Reaction from Red Sox fans has been mixed. "Are you f**'n kidding me?", said Joe from Everett. "That's the last straw - I'll never step foot in that place again". While Mary from Cambridge had a more hopeful view. "I don't care what they call the place - as long as we kick their butts! I love the strategy of taking away the Yankee's biggest weapon - MONEY".
Steinbrenner has asked for fans to weigh in on the new name. All comments to this posting will be forwarded to George's son Hank, who will be making the final decision.
Hmmm...
3 months ago